FIRST MAJOR POINT TO ADDRESS: Is it clear right away what the argument
is? Meaning: Is it clear what she/he believes in? How is it indicated clearly?
Write what you believe to be the thesis of this project in one sentence. (I
believe in __________________).
It is very clear what Kelsey believes in. Her first sentence of her essay is "I believe in kisses." Her thesis is clearly "I believe in kisses." Throughout her essay she develops her idead that support her thesis.
Sources: Are sources indicated for
photos/visuals? How many sources are included for photos? Are they in correct
MLA or APA format? Is the works cited present somewhere within the project? In
alphabetical order? Was proper in-text citation used throughout the paper?
Photo Essay is not yet pictured on page, but I know that you will be using pictures from google, so make sure you add them in the corrct format that we took notes on!! Put the works cited at the bottom of your This I Believe page so the professor can easily find it.
Aesthetics: Is the project visually appealing? Is something lacking?
Comment on any modes that are difficult to read, hear, see, or
understand.
The background of the project is visually appealing, but the project as a whole needs some more colors and sparkle to really show that you belive in kisses!! Maybe change the background to a hot pink/ red color that is more popping?? The font on your page is a little difficult to read and may be more difficult to read from far away.
Mechanics: Comment on any glaring or distracting errors in
grammar, punctuation or spelling (also tense, voice, etc.).
From what I read, I did not notice any grammar mistakes that stuck out to me.
Content:
Comment on the quality of the content. Consider arrangement, font, colors,
sound, volume, accessibility, etc.
The quality of the writing is great. I love your story & I can relate to it as well. I do brelieve that you should change your font to one that is easy to read though. Also, try to make your page more appealing for everyone!! Add more colors and glam to your page! As for accessibility I know that you are working on moving everything over to yout TIB tab on your blog. Just make sure you have everything present on there, audio, photo essay, written text, & your works cited.
Organization: Comment on the placement
of the written essay portion with the visual/mulitmodal portion. Are they
integrated together effectively? Is it awkward?
The written essay portion is not yet on the TIB tab, but I would place it below your photo essay.
Originality: Comment on
originality. Is this something you already knew? Did the person/group try
anything new and exciting?
Kisses are very unoriginal but I believe that you made yours VERY orginal beause you added a spin to it with your boyfriend and the pictures you will be using that you showed me. Also, the story behind it was very cute.
Unifying Elements: Comment on the presence of
a theme throughout all related works. What ties all of it together? Is it
disjointed?
What ties all of your project together is your last paragraoh where you really wrap everything up. Also, once you get your photo essay on your page this will bring it even more together because your pictures go along with your theme.
is? Meaning: Is it clear what she/he believes in? How is it indicated clearly?
Write what you believe to be the thesis of this project in one sentence. (I
believe in __________________).
It is very clear what Kelsey believes in. Her first sentence of her essay is "I believe in kisses." Her thesis is clearly "I believe in kisses." Throughout her essay she develops her idead that support her thesis.
Sources: Are sources indicated for
photos/visuals? How many sources are included for photos? Are they in correct
MLA or APA format? Is the works cited present somewhere within the project? In
alphabetical order? Was proper in-text citation used throughout the paper?
Photo Essay is not yet pictured on page, but I know that you will be using pictures from google, so make sure you add them in the corrct format that we took notes on!! Put the works cited at the bottom of your This I Believe page so the professor can easily find it.
Aesthetics: Is the project visually appealing? Is something lacking?
Comment on any modes that are difficult to read, hear, see, or
understand.
The background of the project is visually appealing, but the project as a whole needs some more colors and sparkle to really show that you belive in kisses!! Maybe change the background to a hot pink/ red color that is more popping?? The font on your page is a little difficult to read and may be more difficult to read from far away.
Mechanics: Comment on any glaring or distracting errors in
grammar, punctuation or spelling (also tense, voice, etc.).
From what I read, I did not notice any grammar mistakes that stuck out to me.
Content:
Comment on the quality of the content. Consider arrangement, font, colors,
sound, volume, accessibility, etc.
The quality of the writing is great. I love your story & I can relate to it as well. I do brelieve that you should change your font to one that is easy to read though. Also, try to make your page more appealing for everyone!! Add more colors and glam to your page! As for accessibility I know that you are working on moving everything over to yout TIB tab on your blog. Just make sure you have everything present on there, audio, photo essay, written text, & your works cited.
Organization: Comment on the placement
of the written essay portion with the visual/mulitmodal portion. Are they
integrated together effectively? Is it awkward?
The written essay portion is not yet on the TIB tab, but I would place it below your photo essay.
Originality: Comment on
originality. Is this something you already knew? Did the person/group try
anything new and exciting?
Kisses are very unoriginal but I believe that you made yours VERY orginal beause you added a spin to it with your boyfriend and the pictures you will be using that you showed me. Also, the story behind it was very cute.
Unifying Elements: Comment on the presence of
a theme throughout all related works. What ties all of it together? Is it
disjointed?
What ties all of your project together is your last paragraoh where you really wrap everything up. Also, once you get your photo essay on your page this will bring it even more together because your pictures go along with your theme.
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